Monday, October 27, 2014

La Confession Part Deux

So now that our nefarious plan has been revealed, I feel compelled to expand on our confession by explaining why we would want to destroy the university. I have spent a total of 12 years pursuing three college degrees and have taught at Chicago State University, Governors State and UIC during the past 23 years. I am obviously not a fan of higher education and clearly not higher education in public institutions. The dozen or so of my former students who have completed terminal degrees and are in the world are the reason that I continue my destructive pursuits. Corrupting their minds and convincing them of the importance of higher education is all but one element of this complex plan. How could it have been me who helped inspire them to pursue degrees beyond the baccalaureate level? Those students were just unwitting pawns in my game to destroy the university to point that "they" would take over CSU. 
Yes, loyal readers, I have secretly been in "their" employ. "They" recruited me long ago, knowing that I would position myself at CSU in such a way that the power to do "their" bidding would eventually be mine. As a lowly associate professor, I could hide within the folds of the university corrupting the minds of both my students and unsuspecting colleagues. Some of these colleagues I even convinced to participate in our plan for CSU domination. "They" never told me why "they" wanted CSU. I believe it was to thwart the exponentially increasing political, social and economic power of the African-American community in Chicago and in Illinois. This priceless gem of higher education excellence was obviously producing too many graduates and with the addition of the College of Pharmacy, it was decided that the time was right for them to control the incredible power that is CSU.
Our power to influence our weak minded colleagues has been documented extensively by the Watson administration at our direction. Our manipulation of multiple media outlets has been remarkably successful though the recent shooting of a civilian by the police chief did go unreported at our direction. The public need not see all of our evil machinations.
To my faculty colleagues, the time is right to join us in destroying the university. Forget the hours of instruction given, personal time sacrificed, students inspired, institutions and communities served. Forget your research agenda, grantsmanship, publication. Forgo the service to your departments, colleges and university. Join Bionaz and me as we continue to drive the university into irrelevance.
I feel relieved to have shared this confession. It's freeing knowing that even though you, loyal readers, know that Bionaz and I are actually controlling events at CSU, it won't matter because in the end, "they" will have the university.

2 comments:

  1. I didn't realize that my communist confession of a few weeks ago would cause such soul-searching in my colleagues. Confessions are contagious like Catholicism and the smallpox they brought. I am so glad I can stop blaming Wayne for his actions, his cronies and his policies. Many of my colleagues told me I was wrong to hold him accountable for his behavior. They asked 'where is the evidence?' even though so much of it has been published on this blog and in other outlets. Moreover, many said that my motivation for trying to hold Wayne accountable was racist. Thanks to Phil's and Bob's posts I know realize that they were correct. Wayne is not to be held accountable for his actions since he is just a puppet of Phil and Bob and I was racist for even suggesting that this rich black man could have any faults.

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  2. I believe you are hiding your light under a bushel. You forgot the part about how our electrical grid is long past its expiration date and how you got the administration to mobilize the campus to take care of it, and then how you convinced them to cancel the plans and do f-nothing about it.

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